While I look at You
by mikaera
Summary: [Goes before Perfect] How everything can change when your time is getting to an end... How everything can change when the thing you wanted the most is now something you must bare... ANGSTANGST... and angst! Read inside for better summary! R&R!


**Hi readers! **

**nn I know, I should be updating the rest of my stories… but well, whatever. This is the same story I have in Spanish, called "Cuando te miro". It's the one that goes before "Perfect". **

**This is a POV of someone you'll notice at the end... about Kai. I don't think will get a lot of reviews, but comment on it please! **

**Okay… the summary… is about how that person feels while he looks at Kai in the (second) battle against Brooklyn (but in a video). **

**It's a little weird, but I rely on Kyle for this one. **

**I hope you like it… there you go…

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While I look at you. 

Kai… you were always the stubborn one. It was obvious you would turn to be stubborn, after being raised up by that man. And you… never give up. You're the best Kai. You're the best, you've always been.

And there you come. You're gonna fight against BEGA, not to face the corporation, but to prove to yourself you're definitely the best. Sure, you had joined BEGA before this.

And you had a good reason to do it. Your life reason. You need to defeat the best, and you still think, you're not.

If you'd only realize you're not the best because you don't want to. That you're not the best because you don't let yourself win to Tyson, that if you wanted to, you'd be able to beat him.

You've already made a decision. You want to win to the one who won you first. Yeah, that's always little Kai's politic in battle.

You point Brooklyn. He's different from the others; he's even different from you Kai. Brooklyn has his own talent. And now he'll face you. Kai… you were also born with the ability to win, but Brooklyn has dealt with it for longer. Brooklyn isn't afraid of winning. But you are.

The fight begins. Well. Kai... you've chosen him to battle… because you know he'll beat you.

And the match starts giving Brooklyn the advantage. If you had stayed longer in the training I gave you, maybe things would be on your side now. But no, Kai. You always have to learn things on your own.

You don't allow the existence of betters, more instructed, more able than you around you. But you go and look for them. Just to prove you something: that you're the best.

You keep doing well on battle. You're a strong boy; you'll always be my favorite because of that. But Brooklyn isn't far behind. You would hate to know that. You love being my favorite, Kai. You love knowing I'm always looking for you, even though you say you hate me.

I watch from this place how you fight against what you can't defeat. Brooklyn is stronger than you. Brooklyn is better.

But you don't realize it, do you?

Everyone at the abbey had the same training. Everyone except you, my little. You're the only one who was given a special training. Because you're special, Kai.

Brooklyn is winning the match. You cry in pain as in the old trainings, you can't avoid him over-powering you that way, he dominates you, he controls your feelings.

As you hated me to do so.

I smile. At last you're realizing, he's gonna win. No, Kai. You know you have your friends behind. You know they're your strength, you know that is Tyson, the innocent boy that could tell with just a smile more than what many of us would say with a million words.

Then they back you up. It's incredible to see how the simple back up of some guys can bring you back to reality.

Yes, Kai. I'm not wrong when I say you're the strongest. You're the one to whom the worst things of the world can happen, but even though he won't give up.

You accept. You accept their help. The strength of you friends goes with you. But it's mainly the inherited strength from your progenitor, and that slight remembrance of your mother, the ones that go with you.

It's hard to believe the energy that faith has. You believe, Kai, you believe. You believe you're gonna win. And it's then when Brooklyn starts to be complicated.

You're the best, Kai. The aureole around you shows that you really have the power. That you're in fact the most powerful person I know, more even than Brooklyn.

But when anything restricts you, then you make up your own limits.

You don't want to win. You don't want to defeat the best. And you know who the best is. The reason of your existence, the reason for you to keep fighting, the one who has always been there, and him. The only one you have to defeat to be the best. But you've never done it.

You see, as I say, you don't want to be the best. Because that way your aim would be completed.

You have so inculcated the idea of living to win, living to demonstrate, that if you don't have anything to win or to show, then you don't live.

Because of me.

Things are on your side now, my dear Kai. Everything's on your side now, Brooklyn is loosing control. In some time it seemed he had won the battle… but as you've always done, you resisted. It's not with him you want to loose.

You give your best shoot. Poor Brooklyn, his first failure. Against you. Who taught you, taught you well, Kai. Who guided you to be as invincible as you are now. You're great.

Alter all you won the battle. I smile. I'm surprised, in fact. I hadn't thought your developments had got so far. You're more than what I thought Kai. You're more.

Confusion, fear, despair, insecurity. Everything's inside you, Kai. And that's why you are this way. Great.

You're tired. You stumble as you triumphant go downstairs. You're feeling bad, and it's that person you want and don't want to defeat, the one who catches you when you fall.

Tyson.

Kai.

It's incredible to see that, after all, there's still one person that matters you more than your own self.

You walk through the corridor before they call an ambulance or something like that. You're fine, you lie. I know you're gonna fall. I know the tear that _other guy who tried to be like you _is crying. He acknowledges there'll never be another like you, Kai.

Now, while I see this in a screen in front of my bed, I think… what would you say if you knew my time is over? That now you have a son to rise up, and me, old and wrinkled, I see you in a screen because it's years since I saw you for the last time?

What would you do, Kai, if you could see me once again? Would you come?

My breathing's exhausted. I'm too old. I gave my entire life to you, Kai. It's over… no more sufferings or tortures for you, your son will not have them either.

Kai… I want to congratulate you. Because after all, you're the best. You're the one who has defeated death. You're the one who has been helped by angels to survive; you have believed and followed only your own way. That has not broken promises made to dead corpses long time ago, but has broken the promises he wanted to.

You were faithful to your parents, not to me.

You could follow their way, not mine even though I tried to put them straight on you.

You're great Kai.

You deserve to be in peace.

You deserve I leave.

Because… you're the most pure soul I know.

My last minutes of life… are for you too. But in another way… this time… I'm not gonna try to see you… because that's impossible. I'm just going to remember you.

I'm leaving, Kai.

Faraway from here. And because of what I made you, I won't see your parents either.

"I'm… sorry…"

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Kai's POV

I answered the phone call. I took the first flight to Russia, leaving my son at my friend's care, along with the son of who was coming with me.

I had to let him come. He's stubborn like me. He always comes with me everywhere, not to let me fall again in those hands.

I entered to the hospital. I don't like Russia, I don't like Russian. I ran through the corridors pushing those who would come into my way. I had to see him. Tyson behind me, saying the 'sorry' I couldn't say because of the pressure on my throat.

I got directly to his room. As I opened the door, a lifeless breeze hung in the air.

Tears started to come to my eyes.

"…Grandfather…?"

But the room was empty. I could hear some noise; I went into the room with some hope but just to see my own image in battle in a screen in front of the bed, as empty as the room.

"It's… it's…" I couldn't speak. I couldn't say anything. I had waited for this day that much… but saying it was different. It was like he had finally understood, and he had to go right now. I felt guilty; I had wished him this end.

"…Kai?" Tyson rested one hand in my back, trying hopeless to comfort me. Nothing would do it.

"He's… gone." I said at last. "Everything's… over."

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**Okay, I hope you liked it… or at least that it's well written… LOL ¬¬**

**Well… the aim with this fic was to show the (love?) that Voltaire feels to his grandson, when he recognizes he hasn't done any good to him, in the exact moment before dying. **

**I believe that when people die is because they've got to the Project that God (or however you want to call Kami) had for them. **

**It was Tyson who went with him because it's the one that could comfort him, he's, from my point of view, the one that gave Kai the strength to go on. **

**Yes, Kai was waiting for the day when his grandfather died and leave him in peace. But in that moment when his life wish came to reality, he realized that he was left without family, in the exact moment his grandfather realized he had been wrong. **

**The "Strength inherited from your progenitor" is the strength of Kai's dad, and the "slight remembrance of your mother" is Dranzer, supposing Kai's mom gave the sacred Phoenix to him. **

**I hope you liked it, please review (at least to tell me the bad it was XD Joking!) Your opinion matters a lot! **

**Thanks for reading! **

**Mikaera. **


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